THE MAN IN THE MIRROR

"If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make a change."
-Michael Jackson

Before I married my wife, we attended premarital counseling with our pastor. Something he told us has been forefront in my thoughts lately. My wife and I have been bickering and fighting over petty stuff lately. Most of the time I'm thinking, "why are we fighting about this?" In the midst of one of our disputes I heard my pastor's words ringing in my head. "Marriage isn't a 50 /50 proposition. It's a 100 / 100 proposition." In other words, you don't say, I'll meet you half way, because you always think you are the one giving 51% while your spouse is the one giving 49%. You have to have the mind-set that I'm going to give my spouse 100% all the time. We haven't been doing that. We instead are pointing fingers saying "I'm giving my 51%!". The truth is neither of us is giving our 51% or even our 49%. I dare not say what I think the percentage might actually be.

I need to look at the 'Man in the Mirror" and make my world a better place. I need to give my family my 100% (or as close as humanly possible) and hope and pray they follow suit in giving their 100%. I'm the head of my house and I'm supposed to lead. There is no better way to lead than by example.

So what am I waiting for? Hmmmmm... Selfishness I guess. I never knew how selfish I was until I got married.

I used to always tell people, "If you want to see yourself, don't look inward but for the reflection in the people who surround you, for in that reflection we see ourselves." That proverbial mirror is scary to look at, but I think I'm looking at it. Now the question is, am I going to "make a change"?

Some may say, "if you TRULY love your family, you will make a change." As if somehow my failures as a husband and father lessen my love. If love was all it took, I'd have this game won. It just seems that at times my selfishness overwhelms my love. I've been with Patty for almost 4 years and I still can't lose my bachelor mentality.

Well, Lord willing, I will change the man in the mirror and my family will prosper because of it.